Beastmomma

I am trying to hunker down for the bar exam which is coming up on Wednesday and Thursday. I am not prepared for the exam, but I am ready for the test to be finished.  One highlight of the week is that I felt a wave of calm wash over me.  I know with all my heart that the best parts of my life are not going to change with the result of the exam.  Also, I drift into thinking about the jobs for which I applied during this study time and the ones that I have seen and am excited to apply for post bar and I feel good about my prospects of having a fulfilling career with or without bar admission.   I hope that these two insights will help me relax and feel confident so that my anxiety is not a factor in a poor outcome on the test.  Even though I know the two things I wrote are completely true, I sill want to kick some bar butt and get admission to MA bar! 

And...here we go!

1. I'm feeling fierce and tired.
2. I want to pass the FUCKING bar exam!  
3. I need more confidence, knowledge, and exam taking skills.
4. I was thinking that I am glad my birthday is AFTER the exam and not right before or during.
5. I wish I had already passed this test.
6. I'm reading practice exam questions and my horoscope for signs of hope.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to eating pizza, tomorrow my plans include feeling INCREDIBLY relieved that my mother has come to take over helping with baby care and Sunday, I am going to do another practice exam!