Beastmomma

My father was nice enough to let me borrow his car while I am in MD.  Today, I went to the pool which was good.  I only did 35 minutes, but it felt good to be back in the water.  On the way back, I stopped at the grocery store.  When I opened the trunk to load the groceries, I noticed a huge box of Depends.  I knew that my father had to use diapers for a while after his surgery.  Hopefully, this is something that is only short term.  However, I still paused and was surprised.  There was also a huge case of Red Bull which made me laugh.  I was struck with the contrast and suddenly had a sensation about my dad in the future.  As he ages, he will always be doing something to keep himself young.  This does assure me, but I am still dreading my parent's aging process.

Tonight, California Girl and I went to Borders.  I noticed an older man who had been there all three times I have gone there this break.  The last time he was there, he wanted to know the location of the coffee house.  People were really rude to him.  Granted, I did not know the whole story, but I felt bad that he was getting treated so badly.  I wish that I had done something, but I did not know what to do.  Today, I saw him in the coffee house.  He was enjoying a yummy looking drink and then reading classifieds.  I am not sure what he was searching for, but I just ached for him.  I worried that he was lonely; I hoped that he found what he was looking for and that he gets to share sweets with someone sweet.

I also thought about my parent's aging.  Even though they drive me crazy, I do not want them to be unhappy.  This is why I have such a hard time following my own bliss when it conflicts with their wishes.  Hopefully, I can find a way to contribute to my parent's happiness while still following my bliss.