Beastmomma

Today was the last day of the woman I supervise at work. She accepted another position which is a pretty big promotion for her. I am happy that she is moving on to better things, but I still feel sad about the change.  When she left, she told me that she was not going to cry and that she loved me.  Then we both proceeded to cry. I was not expecting to have this reaction to her departure because I think that we have had our ups and downs.  Certainly since she is the first person that I officially supervised, I had a learning curve with figuring out how to be a good supervisor and maintain a good working relationship with her. 

Maybe I was imagining my own departure from this position.  The way, after being here a few years, I have found that most of my coworkers have become my family.  It is good to make decisions and to take steps to follow through by taking action. However, there is a part of you that struggles to take the steps that lead you away from what you know to what you have to discover. 

Tomorrow I venture to Seattle to see the law school and get some perspective on whether or not I will be attending Seattle University.  Even though I cannot put weight on my foot, I am thinking that if I can love it when things are hard, then surely I will love it when things are easier.   Since I had lukewarm feelings towards Central, I need to have at least have a "two holy shit" reaction in order to change my whole life to move to Seattle.  I do feel nervous about the logistics of getting there and moving about, but I am trusting that things will work out.  It will be nice to have more information and maybe even to know where the next chapter of my life will take place.

Last night, I had the pleasure of hearing the brilliant Barbara Kingsolver speak at the Duke Chapel.  She was so funny and smart.  Her sense of humor made me like her books even more.  She was speaking about an award she created for writing that addresses social issues. As you can imagine, it was pretty crowded.  Beth had organized some peeps to help get me into the chapel. I was really grateful for all the coordination efforts.   I got dropped off with two pals and then Beth went to park with another friend.  As we walked up to the chapel, we saw the line starting to grow.  We followed the signs for handicap access and found ourselves behind the chapel at an almost secret entrance.  We opened the door and found ourselves near the front.   I found a seat and put my foot up.  A little while later, Beth and the other friend joined us.  We found ourselves so close to Barbara Kingsolver that I waved to her and she smiled at me while she was testing the microphone.

Even though my butt got numb and my friends had to do some mental gymnastics to get me in and out of the chapel, I GOT TO SEE BARBARA KINGSOLVER!  If I had not had the roll-a-bout and had not had surgery, we probably would have been sitting way in the back.   That is quite the silver lining.

Yesterday, I had another doctor's appointment. I was hoping really hard that I would be able to walk on my foot. They had told me that once the bone graft fused to the foot, the pin would be removed and this would make it possible for me to put weight on my foot.  When the old cast came off, I realized that my foot seems to be getting worse. There is just dry skin EVERYWHERE.  I could not stop scratching and each time I touched my foot, a lot of skin would fall.  The x-ray looked good. I am healing properly.  It was time to take the pin out.  The big purpose of my father coming was that he was going to hold me hand.  Instead of handing me his whole hand, he just gave me two fingers.  His strategy was that this way his hand would not hurt.  The process of pulling the pin out lasted about a minute.  It hurt A LOT!

Afterwards, I found out that I was getting a boot which can be removed, but I have to wait until the hole heals where the pin was which takes about four days.  Also, I found out that I CANNOT PUT WEIGHT ON MY FOOT for another three weeks.  This means I am still scooter bound.  I was SO frustrated and sad.   This will certainly cramp my style in Seattle.  I am trying to not be a baby about the whole thing.

An entertaining note, my father told a joke to the person who was taking out my pin and putting on my boot.  You really need to see the joke in person because it involves gestures.  However, the punch line is: "Wait. Fucking one minute."  The guy's face was priceless and he started laughing. It was entertaining to watch the whole thing unfold.