On Thursday, I became a mother of a two month old. As much as I feel like time is going quickly, I have also come to a place where I cannot imagine my life without my daughter in it. While I do long for aspects of my life pre-baby (sleep, time alone with Partner, ability to go out to dinner, movie, or seeing friends without coordinating coverage), I am adjusting to the new reality. The last week was pretty challenging as Partner and I were on our own, but we did it! While I still feel inadequate, I faced a lot of my fears and came to the other side.
She had a hard time sleeping for a few nights which made me feel even more exhausted and unsure if I could do this. I was thankful that I had some help come on Tuesday and Thursday. It made the transition easier. Two highlights of the week were outings which made me feel more independent. First, I took lunch to my neighbor who had her second baby about two weeks after our little girl was born. While I have not had much time to cook, my mom made a bunch of stuff and put into our freezer. I went over to L's place with the baby and we lunched and talked. While she was not far from my place at all, I still felt like I had a great adventure. I also liked the feeling of being with my friend while holding my baby. On Friday, a friend who I think of as "super mom" came over with her two boys. We went for a walk with our kids. I felt excited that I was able to assemble the stroller myself and to be out and about with a pal. We went to a coffee house in town and I was so happy that the folks working there were friendly and kind to us. They held the door and brought our food to the table. At one point, I dropped the pacifier and the guy behind the counter picked it up and rinsed it off for me!
Next week, Partner, Baby, and I are going on a road trip to MD to spend Thanksgiving with my family. Preparation is intense. I feel like my days of traveling light are gone for awhile. I made lists and coordinated with my parents to see if we could borrow some items from friends or family. Partner and I started packing today and I am amazed at how many things such a small person needs. Of course, I am sure that we will realize we over packed and under packed. As much as the trip is about spending time with family, I think it is also about learning to travel with our daughter, figuring out how to bring along everything she needs and things we all want. Fingers crossed that she does well in the car and we all have our sanity by the time we reach my parent's place!